Almighty Allah outlines the purpose of marriage in The Holy Quran, as follows.
And among His signs (one) is that He created for you spouses from among yourselves (i.e. human beings) so that you may gain comfort among them; and He established between you love and compassion. Indeed in this is a great sign for people who ponder. (Surah Luqman, verse 21.)
IN this verse Allah Ta’ala useds the Arabic term azwaaj which means ’spouses’. The object of nikah delineated in this verse, therefore, applies to both parties, the wife and the husband. Allah Ta’ala thus declares that the purpose of having a spouse is three fold:
For comfort and contentment
Establishment of mawaddah.
Establishment of compassion.
When the above are identified as the components of a marriage it naturally follows that any marriage devoid of all or some of these three ingredients, has not served its purpose. Likewise, if these three spiritual components exist in a marital relationship but not fully then too, such a union is not complete. In both cases, the partners in that bond of nikah have to do some serious soul-searching.
The beauty of the Arabic language is borne out by the choice of words in this verse. Allah Ta’ala says that He established mawaddah between husband and wife. This is deeper in meaning than the word mahabbat which translates as ‘love’. Mawaddah is mutual love. It is the connection of two hearts, as mentioned in the Tafseer of Qurtubi. Mawaddah is different to muhabbah in the sense that the former is a love that connects two hearts.
There is another unique blessing of nikah inferred from this verse. Every Muslim knows, and the Holy Quran has categorically mentioned this teaching in at least three places, that Muslim couples don’t court before marriage. Courting is a custom of the kuffar. Marriage in Islam, therefore, is not preceded by love and promiscuity. Yet Allah Ta’ala states in Surah 30:21 that He has created this special bonding of the hearts (mawaddah) between husband and wife. So if there was no connection and affair between the couple prior to nikah, in spite of which the bond of mwaddah has still been established, it proves that the nikah itself is a means of achieving love, compassion, and unity of the hearts. We ask our couples: After 7 or 10 years of marriage, is this comfort, love, stability, and compassion still there? If not, then you need urgent spiritual counseling.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Purpose of Nikah (Marriage) in the Holy Qur'aan
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Marriage